Pro or Anti? Why must you be one or the other?

Pro or anti, pick one. Or so debates surrounding various parenting decisions claim. It seems that you are forced to choose one side over another absolutely. So you must be either pro-vaccine or anti-vaccine, pro-co-sleeping or anti, pro-home birth or pro-hospital birth, etc.

But is that the case, and are we just fueling the “mommy wars” even more by buying into that? In my opinion, we needn’t be one or the other, and buying into the false dichotomy only serves to separate us and fuel the vitriol.

Oh, but surely you must choose one or the other of these things? Yes and no. I think it is perfectly acceptable to choose one for your family and yet not be against the opposite choice for another. For example, I’m not pro- or anti-vaccines. I think each family should look at the actual data (look at the vaccine inserts ad studies, many of which are easily accessible online), as well as looking at their child’s circumstances and any impact the decision may have on others and make a decision from there. After doing that, some families may forgo some or all vaccines, and others would have them. Some might even make different decisions for different children in the same family. I support whatever informed decision is made.

As an aside, I do find it interesting when debate rages around vaccines that are routinely given in the US but not in the UK. I never even knew American infants were routinely vaccinated against HepB until Kieran was older, as we lived in the UK when he was born and so weren’t offered it. My Health Visitor thought the chicken pox jab silly and couldn’t believe it was given in the US.

Back to my point – can we not see that there is rarely a parenting decision that is always right or wrong? Reality is often more nuanced than that. So why don’t we agree to disagree when needed and try to get along?


7 Quick Takes

— 1 —

Leo has decided that naps outside the house just aren’t happening. Thankfully he’ll sleep in the car if tired, but otherwise he’s really not into napping away from home, with the one possible exception of Mass (and then only if he’s completely exhausted, because otherwise he wants to get to the piano or altar or choir). This makes for some interesting outings, as he’s knackered but wants to play. Even at home he won’t sleep if he thinks his siblings will play with him.

— 2 —

I love the conversations my children have, with me, each other, or other adults. One car ride Kieran was telling me all about his plan to get a pet crocodile by digging a pit in the front yard and waiting for it to rain. Evidently a crocodile will crawl into the pit then, and then Kieran can just put a cage over it. Charlotte decided that the crocodile should be named “Hello Kitty”. Leo was asleep for this conversation, but I’m sure he would’ve joined in, if only to say “giggle, giggle, giggle”. (Yes, he actually says the word “giggle” instead of actually giggling sometimes)

— 3 —

I can say with certainty that I’ve no desire to tempt fate and eat nightshades after Tuesday. Leo found one, maybe two, veggie straws that Charlotte had dropped. Usually I’m extremely vigilant about making sure no food is dropped, but that day was a bit mad what with gymnastics, watching two other kids while their baby sister was born, and then Kieran’s violin lesson. Anyway, Leo found the veggie straw(s) at dinner. About 30 minutes later, he started screaming inconsolably, then was violently sick. I got him sponged off and calmed down, and he fell asleep, thankfully. He nursed, screamed some more but didn’t get sick again. It took about a day before he was completely back to normal, though. It reminds me of how I react to even the smallest amount of tomato when I’m pregnant. I feel absolutely horrible for about 24 hours from even eating one bite of tomato. So, in case I was tempted to eat a potato now and then, this incident has cured me of that idea.

On a funny note, I was explaining to Kieran and Charlotte that potatoes are nightshades, so I can’t eat them. Charlotte asked about sweet potatoes, and I said it was okay to eat and isn’t a nightshade. She then asked if it was a “morning-shade”. That girl cracks me up.

— 4 —

. Why does it seem that any difference in parenting is so often interpreted as an attack? Are we so insecure that we must think a person who doesn’t parent exactly like we do is making a judgment against us? Why can’t we just do what works for our families and let others do the same? After all, it is the parents themselves who are the experts on their own children, so what works for one mightn’t work for them.

— 5 —

Why is adoption so costly? A couple of weeks ago on Baby Center I saw a woman who couldn’t keep her twins and was putting them up for adoption. There were pages of responses from people who’d happily adopt them, so it isn’t that there’s a dearth of people willing to adopt. Two of my friends are in the process of adopting children, and I just can’t believe the cost. It just seems that, with so many children needing homes and so many parents willing to adopt, it could be a bit less expensive. But maybe I just don’t understand the full breakdown of costs.

— 6 —

I need recipe ideas for my veg bag from this week. We got a lot of kale. I’m making kale chips tonight, but I certainly won’t need to use all of it. We also got Brussels sprouts. The only time those have sounded good to me was at the end of my pregnancy with Kieran, but I’m open to suggestions for how to fix them. I need to get some fresh mozzarella so I can make caprese salad with all the tomatoes we got (not for me, of course). But I have fresh spinach and lettuce for me. Yum!

— 7 —

Kieran’s definitely my child. He’s been begging to rearrange the furniture. My husband knows how much I love rearranging things, but there’s not much room for rearranging at the moment. I’m tempted to try it, though. I’ll have to consult Kieran.

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Crafty Thursday

I finished yet another ruffle dress/pants outfit, but this one isn’t for Charlotte. I decided to send it to a friend so she can sell it for her adoption fund. She’s adopting a boy through Reece’s Rainbow and is trying to raise the funds to bring him home. If you can help her financially, I know she’d appreciate it. Please also keep them in your prayers.


I decided to move on to a different project. I’d been cleaning out my closet, getting rid of shirts that either don’t fit or have holes or I just don’t wear. I wasn’t sure what, if anything, I wanted to do with them, but thought I’d look around online for any ideas first. Well, I found this tutorial to make a braided rug out of old shirts and I was sold. The project is now underway, and hopefully the kids will have a cute rug for their room soon.


Book Nook: The Brave Little Seamstress

In searching for books for Charlotte, I came across a website recommending The Brave Little Seamstress by Mary Pope Osborne. It looked cute from what I could tell, so I searched the library catalogue and was able to find it. We’ve now renewed the book because the kids are enjoying so much; I’m enjoying reading it nearly as much as they enjoy listening to it. The seamstress is indeed courageous and clever, thinking her way out of various dilemmas that arise after she announces her accomplishment of killing “seven in one blow” (seven what? You’ll have to read the book for that). Giselle Potter’s illustrations perfectly capture Osborne’s storytelling. Between the two of them, the story really comes to life. This might be a book we purchase at some point.

Crafty Thursday

So, I’ve had the pieces for another mei tai cut out for months. For some reason I just hadn’t sat down to put it together. I finally decided to do so this past week. It only took a couple of hours, even with interruptions. I like it. I still need to put Velcro on the panels, but otherwise it’s finished.


Then I finished another ruffle dress. I love it! More importantly, Charlotte loves it. I’m tempted to take orders and sell them, but I’d have to work out time logistics and all that. I would have to make sure there’s still plenty of time to teach and play with me kids. I am getting faster at these dresses, though.


Book Nook: The Serpent Slayer

Since I’m all about strong female characters for Charlotte’s books, I was thrilled when she chose The Serpent Slayer and Other Stories of Strong Women at the library – all on her own! Inside are various folk tales from around the world that feature strong female characters. Some are princesses, some are peasants; some marry their true loves, and some do not. In at least one the character is commended not only for defeating a horrible serpent, but also for the fact that she had many children – truly what better way to show all that women do, and that such courage does not negate motherhood?!

In addition to having delightful stories, the illustrations in this book are superb. I would definitely recommend this book, for sons or daughters.

Sunday Snippets – a Catholic Carnival

This week’s question asks for my fave formal prayer. That would be the Anima Christi. In case you’d unfamiliar with it, here it is: Soul of Christ, sanctify me; Body of Christ, save me; Blood of Christ, inebriate me; water from the side of Christ, wash me; passion of Christ, strengthen me; o good Jesu, hear me; within Thy wounds, hide me; suffer me not to be separated from Thee; from the malicious enemy, defend me; in the hour of my death call me and bid me come unto Thee that with Thy Saints I may praise Thee for all eternity.

My posts for the week:
Book Nook: The Magic Nesting Doll
I am Beautiful
Crafty Thursday

For all Sunday Snippets entries, visit RAnn. God bless!